To Mikan
by lemonandapples
Summary: ONESHOT.The breakup of mikan and natsume. I am a fan of MxN but this thought came into my mind. RxR please. criticism is welcomed.


**This is my first fic so please excuse me from any errors:)feel free to critisize!**

Natsume sighed as he walked back to his oversized room. He dropped his bag on the carpeted floor and jumped onto his bed. He rolled and flipped but still, he could not find a comfortable position to rest in. Finally, he decided to lie flat on his back with his limbs spread out as though he was a starfish. His stared dreamily at the ceiling.

"Natsume! It is dinner time!" Aoi said with a little to much enthusiasm when she burst into Natsume's room. No matter how he looked at her, a certain brunette would be standing in front of him. Although crimson and chocolate brown were two very different colours, it all seemed the same to him at that moment.

"Mikan..." he whispered as he recalled all the things that happened to him for the last two days.

"Stay away from me!" she screamed. Tears were trickling down her cheeks as she glared at him. Her tears was like a scratch on a beautiful picture, ruining her face. It hurt Natsume so much to see her like that. But he knew he could do nothing out of this state as he was the one who brought her to this state. He wanted so badly to hug her her tightly and say sorry and that everything was just a bad dream but he knew she would just push him away.

"Mikan... I..."

"Why? Why are you doing this to me?" Mikan cried. She leaned back on the sakura tree as she slowly squatted down.

Natsume could not take it. He could not bear to see Mikan crying. He wanted to have the old cheerful and bubbly Mikan back. He wanted to be the pervert boyfriend that called her by her panties. He wanted to be that over-protective boyfriend that did not allow boys to go near her and would get jealous over the smallest action the boys do to her-even if it is just borrowing her pencils. He wanted Mikan and him to have their daily fight over thin air. He wanted to hold her in his arms. He wanted Mikan to blab about spongebob when all he thinks of is how cute she is when she does that. He wanted to turn back in time and redo the things he had done.

He went nearer to Mikan and slowly wrapped his hands around her small body. She knew she liked the feeling of being hugged by Natsume again. However, she knew that that hug might be the last hug she would get from Natsume. She bowed her head towards Natsume's chest and cried till his shirt was all soaked with tears but he didn't mind. She was Mikan Sakura after all.

"Hey Natsume! Why are you ignoring me?" Mikan screamed across the hallway.

Natsume turned to see a his girlfriend. It was already a month since Natsume and Mikan started going out. Nobody thought they would come together. He was the school's hottie. He had the money. He was in the 'in' group. But Mikan was just a nobody. She wasn't one of those girls whose names would be in a guy's 'A' list but she would also not be in his 'F' list. She was an average. But something about them clicked. Love works this way right?

They first met under the sakura tree. Natsume almost killed Mikan when he jumped down the tree. Since that day. The lovebirds would fight everyday. However, if you are lucky, you would find Natsume's eyes smiling around mikan ad his lips would curl up whenever she's around. Finally, Natsume decoded to ask her out.

However, to Natsume's friends, dating a nobody ain't a very impressive job. Soon, Natsume found his friend laughing at Mikan. They would have bets on when the couple would break up. His friends would have 'grown fatter' leaving him no space to sit in during lunch. Natsume was still a teenager. Which teen would have no difficulties coping with peer pressure? So he decided to ignore Mikan.

"what are you talking about?" Natsume said flatly.

"you know what I am talking about!" Mikan cried.

"polka... I have some things to handle now... can we meet tomorrow at our tree during lunch?" he asked. Of course, he had no intention of doing what he said.

Mikan nodded. She did not believe what Natsume said but she still decided to listen to them.

~.~

The next day during lunch, Mikan went to the tree right after class. On seeing her boyfriend was still not there yet, she sat down under the tree and leaned against the tree. She closed her eyes, enjoying the gentle breeze that was caressing her face. She soon forget what she was there for. But when she remembered, she could not help but think of the way Natsume was treating her. A tear rolled down her cheeks leaving a tears mark on her face. A little frown was visible on her mouth. At that moment, she looked exactly like a fallen angel.

Five minutes passed. Ten minutes passed. It was already two minutes before lunch break's over but Natsume was still not there. She opened her eyes. Instead of the cheery, happy expression in her eyes, anger was present. If you looked closer, there was a tinge of hurt and confusion in them too. She stood up and walked back to class.

After school, Natsume hurried to his locker to put back his books. He wanted to get away from Mikan. However, fate was certainly not on his side.

"Natsume you bastard! Why didn't you come and see me?" Mikan screamed.

" Sorry Mikan. I had something to catch up with." Natsume reasoned.

"oh. Yeah?" she spat. "you call running away from your girlfriend an errand? I can't believe you! What a coward are you!". By now, a large crowd was already around them.

Before Natsume could even speak, all the hurt Mikan was trying to hide was already coming out of her. Tears were threatening to fall from her eyes but Mikan still held back. She did not want Natsume and the entire school population to witness her breaking down. She turned her back and squeezed through the crowd and she ran to a particular tree.

Although Natsume wanted to hide from her, he found himself wanting so badly to go comfort her. Then it struck him, he loved Mikan more than anything else in the world. And he was foolish enough to hurt her. She was the only one who knew the real him that he was hiding from his friends. He sacrificed their love for a friendship that was not even real. He regretted every moment that he ignored Mikan or said harsh things to her. He regretted not being there for her when she was hurt whereas Mikan was always there for him. He regretted not treasuring her.

Natsume chased after Mikan. Even though Mikan was already no where in sight, Natsume knew where she was. When he reached the sakura tree, Mikan was there sobbing.

Mikan slowly broke the hug between Natsume and herself. She calmed herself and stopped the tears from coming out.

"sorry for you shirt." she muttered.

Natsume shook his head. He sat down beside Mikan. After a period of uncomfortable silence, Mikan finally spoke.

"Nastume let's... let's break up"

His eyes widened. It hurt Mikan to say those words as much as it hurt Natsume to hear those words. However, Mikan was quite sure that that was the correct thing to do.

"no Mikan...we can't"

"Natsume you don't understand. All the hurt that is in my heart... it will take a period of time before it goes no more. I am not trying to blame you Nat... just give me some time." Mikan said with a sad smile.

Natsume knew it was no use talking to her. Mikan reached out for Natsume's face and gave him a small peck on his cheeks. With that, Mikan walked away.

Natsume stared at the figure until it faded away. He felt like an idiot whose heart was ripped out of his body. His eyes shut as the tears in his eyes fell.

Mikan was gone.

"Mikan? I am Aoi! Natsume? Eh! Natsume!" Aoi shouted as she shook her dearest brother.

Natsume shook his head furiously. He stared at his sister and realised he was no longer under that sakura tree but his bedroom.

"give me five minutes sis" he said, "oh and you tell dad and mom to start eating first"

Aoi closed the door quietly. When Natsume was sure Aoi was not looking, he went to his table and took out a piece of paper.

'_to Mikan'_ he wrote. '_I am really sorry for my childish behavior to you for the past_ _week. I know I was mean. I am not trying to blame others or anything but I was laughed at. I could not take it. I am really sorry.'_

_ 'if you must know, I would sometimes wonder why I liked you. You weren't the prettiest girl like Luna or the richest like me or Imai. After I thought of all the things you weren't, I found myself very stupid. Why was I concentrating on all the stuff you did not have, which I don't think is very important, instead of all the other things which made me fall in love with you? You are nice. You are funny. You won't let your mood that day effect our date. You were always there to listen to me although you had other problems yourself. You did not laugh at my secrets mockingly. However, I was a complete opposite of you. Despite that, you loved me unconditionally for what I am and not for how I looked of what I had.'_

_ 'I am begging you to forgive me. I am so sorry. We may not come back together again but there is still some hope in me that believes we can come together. And if you don't, I hope you'll find someone that will treasure you and love you the way I will if I can do this all over again'_

_ 'Thank you for letting me learn my lesson and maturing me. Thank you for the memories you given me. I am not very sure if you will read this letter but if you do, please know that I am sorry I did not have the guts to say this in front of you but you must know that I love you'_

_ 'natsume'_

_ A_fter writing, he left the room for dinner.


End file.
